Episodia 2: Angel Demons Might Fly
by SlashAS
Summary: The second in the Angel Episodes series "Episodia". Lorne is casting parts for his new play, but there is some disagreement over the actors. Meanwhile Angel is investigating a recent supernatural attack on a cinema. What do they have in common?


INT LORNE'S OFFICE

Lorne is sat at his desk and is reading a list of people who are auditioning for the part of Ramona in his latest production, which is a play called "Demons might fly". Gunn is seated next to him.

Lorne: It looks like it's going to be another slow, uneventful day.

Gunn: You say that every time you hold auditions.

Lorne: Yeh, but at the end of this one, I know that my ears are going to be ringing to the tune of "My heart will go on" for the rest of the night. Thanks for helping me on this one Gunn.

Gunn: Yeh but if I knew that you was just gonna be whining, I think I would have rather continued doing what I was doing.

Lorne swivels around in his chair, leans back and twiddles his thumbs.

Lorne: This a good enough impression Sparky? Maybe you should put your thumbs to a better use?

Gunn: Yeh my thumbs can be your earplugs anytime brother. So what parts are we doing today?

Lorne: Just the one, I've got fifty people on my list so I've had to put the others back until tomorrow.

Gunn: For the part of Ramona,? But it's only three lines.

Lorne: But there's one thing I've not told you.

Gunn: What?

Lorne: She gets to kiss me.

Gunn: But Gerald's Herman isn't he?

Lorne: He died this morning.

Gunn: How?

Lorne: Fell on a stake at the Vlad the Impaler exhibit at the museum.

Gunn: Damn, bet they had a job cleaning up the dust.

Lorne: So I cast myself in the part, and looking at these pictures, not one of these beauties are beast enough for me.

Gunn: Eh?

Lorne: No green demons, No Pyleans, All human or vamp. That one's quite hot though

Gunn: Which one?

Lorne points to a picture of Fred on the auditions list.

Gunn: Fred no no no she's not going nowhere near your slimy mouth, if that's what you're thinking. She's not going in your scene

Lorne: She's not going in my play

Gunn: Oh yes she is, she's getting a main part, cos you said I get to choose who plays Trixie.

Lorne: But Trixie has two scenes with me.

Gunn: But she whoops your ass.

Lorne: Oh, I didn't think of that, ouch.

Gunn: Well it is your script.

Lorne rubs his bottom and looks scared. Gunn looks pleased.

INT ANGEL'S OFFICE

Angel is seated at his desk, and has a sketch of a female vampire in front of him. Wesley and Winifred are seated at the opposite end of the desk.

Angel: Right, I guess we all know why we're here.

Wesley: Yes, nice drawing Angel.

Angel: Well I have had many years to practice. My father said I never had the talent, mind you he never said that I had talent for anything.

Spike enters the room.

Spike: Oh quit it with the sob stories.

Angel: Spike, what a pleasant surprise!

Winifred: Where did you come from?

Spike: Been hiding behind the door listening in the whole time, with my heightened sensory devices.

Winifred: By that I suppose you mean your ears.

Spike: Yup.

Wesley: Are you here for Angel's speech or are you just here to be annoying?

Spike: You know me, I come and go as I please, after all I am Angel's special guest, or should I say prisoner, since the only blood around here is the farmyard and suet kind.

Angel: You can go and leave as you please. And if you go feeding off humans.

Spike: You'll get your corporate cronies to chop off my head, yep right. Who's that honey on the picture?

Angel: Well if you would care to listen to me and stop talking crap then maybe you'll mind out.

Spike: Yeh, always like a good pep talk, especially when it's given by a car salesman with poofy hair, by the way, I'll take the Lamburgini for a spin.

Angel: No way

Spike: Fine I'll just take the Viper then

Angel: Er

Spike: You can't stop me

Angel: The vampire on the picture is Elendra Geldar.

Wesley: A 1940s movie star who got turned back in '63.

Angel: Yes and our client Mr Richards has reported strange goings on in his movie theatre and he believes it's something to do with.

Spike snatches the picture from Angel.

Spike: This little Angel here.

Angel tries to take the picture away from Angel. Spike puts the picture high up in the air.

Spike: ah ah ah ah, no sexy Angel's present for Mr Atonement up in heaven, This vamp bird's going to hell with me.

Wesley: Haven't you also got something to atone for?

Spike: By hell I have, but I'll just stake myself before my soul gets all clean like.

Angel takes the picture from Spike.

Angel: Glad you're a fan Spike.

Spike: Fan of what?

Angel: My art. Want me to sign your picture for you?

Spike: No way, I'd sooner buy a fake off ebay than have your holy scriptures all over my vamp beauty.

Winifred: So what's a movie star got to do with strange goings on in a movie theatre?

Spike: It's pretty obvious, duh. Turned, one of me

Spike turns towards Angel.

Spike: Oh and king of the corporate underworld here.

Winifred: So is she a movie star turned usher or does she make the popcorn?

Wesley: Fred, I've been meaning to ask you this for a long time.

Winifred: What?

Wesley: Are you taking something, cos you are a bit loopy this morning?

Winifred: I haven't had my weetabix.

Spike: I cleaned Buffy's cupboard of Weetabix once, yummy.

Winifred: Always thought you were the bloodabix type.

Angel: I like coffee.

Spike: Oh and Mr Posh also like croissant's does he, . I am so gonna call you Mr continenal, there was this one time we were in France a hundred years ago and you should have seen the.

Angel: Shut up Spike.

Spike: The snails begged for their lives .


End file.
